🧡 This post is part of my Twin Pregnancy at 46 series.
Start from Week 20 →
https://www.freyanaturaltherapy.co.uk/blogs/my-twin-pregnancy-over-40/115025668-20-week-twin-scan

I had intended to continue writing this blog regularly, but caring for two babies is absolutely exhausting. I genuinely didn’t believe it would be this hard.

That said, my twin girls are adorable and worth every bit of the exhaustion I feel.

Get Help (If You Can)

Exhaustion is the word that sums up the early days for me. And I did have help — not just from my husband, but my mother-in-law gifted us a live-in maternity nurse who specialised in twins for the first few weeks.

When we arrived home from hospital, my husband had to rush off to collect her from the station. I was left standing there with two babies in car seats, not knowing what on earth I was doing… and then they both started crying. A lot.

The maternity nurse arrived about 45 minutes later and calmly took control. She set up a changing station downstairs, made sure we had a cot both upstairs and downstairs (brilliant advice — saves endless trips on the stairs), and helped us create a simple routine.

With twins, this was golden advice: stick to a schedule. It gives you a sense of control when everything feels overwhelming.

Feeding Twins & Total Exhaustion

In the early days, the girls needed feeding every three hours. I would breastfeed one baby, hand her to my husband or the maternity nurse for a bottle top-up, then feed the other — and repeat.

When I wasn’t breastfeeding, I was expressing to try to encourage more milk. It was relentless. On top of that, both girls suffered from silent reflux, which meant a lot of crying and very broken sleep.

Eventually, I took them to see a craniosacral therapist, which helped immediately, and changing to a specialist reflux formula was a complete game-changer.

Losing My Confidence (and Finding It Again)

Although I didn’t suffer from postnatal depression, I did completely lose my confidence. I became so reliant on having help that I felt genuinely scared about coping on my own once the maternity nurse left.

We talked it through and created a gradual “step-down” plan, where she reduced her days slowly until I felt able to manage alone. It worked brilliantly — but even then, it took me a long time to build the confidence to leave the house with both babies and go into town on my own.

Local Twins Club – Find Your People

One of the biggest turning points for me was discovering our local twins and triplets club. It ran every two weeks and was full of parents with twins from newborns up to about age five.

The first time I arrived (after the usual epic effort of getting two babies out of the house, into the car, out of the car, into the buggy and up the steps), two twin mums appeared, took one baby each, handed me a cup of coffee, and led me to the sofa.

Bliss.

Being around people who get it is everything. If you’re expecting twins, find your local twins club while you’re still pregnant.

Baby Classes – Sanity Savers

Baby classes were another source of sanity for me. They forced me to get out of the house instead of becoming a hermit.

Yes, it was hard being surrounded by mums with one baby when I had two — but it was still comforting to connect with other new parents and feel part of the outside world again.

A few things that really helped me during pregnancy and the early weeks:

• A specialist pregnancy pillow

•  A twin nursing pillow – an absolute must

• Massage and body products that are safe for pregnancy – relaxing/comforting

• Essential oils for a diffuser – uplifting in the early days

• A Snugglebundl – a genius carry blanket for lifting sleeping babies into car seats

• Join your local twins group during pregnancy (often great for second-hand baby items)

• If you’re expecting twins, enlist help for when you come home from hospital
  Even 48 hours of support can make a huge difference

• Failing that, stock your freezer with healthy meals

And above all… try to enjoy the ride. It goes frighteningly fast. 💛